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My mother, 84 who has early signs of dementia is currently a resident of a assited living facility in Massachusetts. Three months ago, in August 2011 my sister who has a "durable power of attorney' went to the local police station and took out "no trespass" orders with the assisted living facilites address on them. The local police served them to 5 family members and we are no longer able to visit or go on the ALF property for one year.

The orders state that my sister the DPOA has lawful control of the assisted living facilites address which is untrue, do not make any mention of my mothers name or the assisted living facilities owner's name. The no trespass orders are not court ordered and are not even signed by my sister with a DPOA designation for my mom.

Apparently she walked into the local police station flashed her DPOA and filed a false police report stating that she did not feel that my mom was safe when she was in our presence. The local police detective did not even check the validity of the DPOA or the reason for the No Trespass request and just issued them without asking any further questions. The orders were filed against a daughter, my mom's 80 yr. terminally-ill sister who has since passed away, and her 3 daughters, my mom's nieces. My sister with the DPOA did not discuss this action prior with my mom, inform her of it after the fact, and my mom was devasted when hearing of it. She also has gone so far as to block our telphone numbers so my mom cannot recieve calls from us as well without her consent. She also will not allow my mother to take part in the activities she has in the past prior to her going to the ALF in MAy 2011 like attending church,outings with her friends, organization meeting, etc.

My sister, the DPOA refuses to rescind them at my Mom's request. My mom placed a call to her attorney regarding the matter but my sister has advised the attorney not to contact my mom regarding the matter.

When we contacted the ALF regarding the matter we were told that the facility had to abide by them..

We have been advised that they are not legal because they have not been issued by the court. When speaking to the local police chief, Protective Services, the state ALF Ombudsmen office they advised us to hire a attorney. We consulted 2 different elder attorneys and they advised us that the only way to undo the No Trespass orders is to get into probate court and petition for a court appointed guardian.

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All of that sounds very strange.  I agree with you that the sister seems to be misusing her position as healthcare agent, but I'm not sure what other information I can give you, beyond the advice you have already received:  Hire a lawyer and look into a guardianship for your mother with you, or some other reasonable person as guardian.  I suppose you could fight all of the actions your sister has taken and try to undo the damage.  You could also seek to remove the healthcare agent, something that is allowed under Massachusetts law.  However, I think you need a permanent solution to the problem (the sister).  Once in court, I think your sister will have a difficult time explaining her actions and, if your version of events is correct (her 80 year-old sister is a threat to her???), I find it hard to believe that a judge will want your sister holding any power over your mother.  Good luck.

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